Fear not the future.

Bloggity, blog, blog.

If you have not, you should.  These things are fun, and fun is good.

I'm learning to play "Sweet Home Alabama" on the guitar.  I have the opening riff and the basic placement of the chords down!  I plan to practice the crap out of that, then move on to making it look cool.  My goal is to have it learned by the time we leave for our family reunion (in Alabama, nonetheless) on May 29th.  I thought it would be cool to entertain my family with it on our long RV ride.  Being from Alabam means a lot to them. 

I wish my life was a documentary, so I could always remember the funny things that were said or the feelings I was having at any given moment.  There's nothing like replaying the good...and the bad.  I'm a dweller, so I supposed that'd be perfect.

I've had the most dull, wonderful spring break.  I was only on break from my day job, so my moonlighting continued at the country club.  It's nice only working one job.  This week made me feel like I had really graduated from college already (except for the fact that I was still working at the country club, and I do hope that's never my career).  It's an enjoyable job, but I can't continue to work my college job when I have a degree.  It's just not sensible. 
But who wants to be sensible all the time?

I've got some options right now.  I could stay here in Winfield and teach (if I get a job here), or I could move to Kansas City and teach.  On one hand, I'm close to my family if I stay in Winfield.  BUT -- I will be the only person my age left here.  Everyone else will leave and my only option for friends will be the college students in this town, who are good friends, but I refuse to be that creepy person who couldn't leave college behind.  If I move to KC, a world of possibility opens for me.  More money, a lush farmer's market open all year round, people abound, waiting for me to meet.  But, I'll be farther from my family than I've ever been.  I have to decide what's more important.  Can I handle the change? 
OR
I could go to grad school!  Of course I'd want to do that on the East Coast, so I'd still be moving away from my family.
I wish my emotions didn't control my life so much, so that I could make the best life decisions based on practical reason. 

I hate having my future so up in the air like this.  I'm a planner.  A control-freak, if you may.  Of my own life anyway.  I'm in a constant state of unrest and anxiety, when I should be just enjoying myself in these last few weeks with my friends here in Winfield.
I am FREAKING out.

The good news is that I could do anything.  Really.  I'm not attached by a relationship to hold me back.  I don't have to plan my future according to someone else's timeline.  So the depressing single life has a sunny side!  :)

That's all I can muster right now.  More to come, I hope.